Thursday, February 12, 2009

Writing things down sometimes helps.



How can I describe it, the hurt, the pain, the depth of sorrow that I have experienced? A beautiful life was cut short, cherished dreams were shattered in only a matter of seconds. A treasured wife ripped from the arms of her adoring husband. How can it be true? One minute a laughing bride, her lips curved in a endearing smile gazed up into the face of her newly married husband, the next moment finds her laying on the ground, her last words lingering on the ever whitening lips. Those last words, “I love you” would be replayed over and over again in the disbelieving mind of her husband. The exchanged words of love, a sweet kiss and smile were the last things they shared in their perfect life together. Hopes were dashed, a life full of fun and vigor ended, families were left clinging together, a newly married husband became a very young widower. Life seemed pretty bleak on earth, but in heaven let me suggest to you was quite a different story.
There, a new life was started, the treasured dreams that were dreamt of a beautiful city of gold were now being fulfilled. An adored daughter was caught up in the arms of her long awaited Father. Here there would be no broken dreams, life was perfect! Days of sorrow were over for her, nothing but perfect bliss awaited her. Worshiping the King of Kings, gazing into the face of her Lord, and living forever in His awesome presence, these were the things she had looked forward to and is now experiencing.
But what about those left on earth? Life continues even if we wish it to stop. Jobs must be worked, chores attended to, but all without the sunshine that she had brought to everyone she met. But we are not without hope, we have a blessed assurance that a peace that passes all understanding can be ours. The arms of the Father that welcomed Alaina home to be with Him, are also wrapped around us in our time of need. Even though I don’t understand why it happened I do know this; I can, and will trust God, He has shown Himself worthy of my trust in the past and He is not about to stop now. He created life and has a perfect plan for it so why should I doubt that plan? Do I think that a God who is control of everything, and made everything, and loves everything with a perfect and sacrificial love would make a mistake? Absolutely not! All throughout history He has taken situations that we have thought were bad and turned them into good.
The story of Job talks about suffering, but through it all he said “Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Queen Esther was taken away from everyone and everything she loved, to become a participant in a beauty contest for the next Queen. But woven through her tale was a God who had His hand in everything and orchestrated every event, and used her to save his people! And the most tragic one of all, Jesus. He left all the glory and splendor of heaven to come and die the most brutal death. He suffered tremendously in hands of those He came to save. But because of that we can have hope. Death cannot really separate us from those we love if we believe in Him. The God of all gods, the King of all kings, the Lord of all lords has conquered death once and for all. So who am I to doubt His ways? Who am I to think that I would have had a better plan? He gives and He takes away, and though it still hurts, even though I miss her so much, even though it seems the pain will never go away, I know One who will be with me and comfort me, and I know that I will see her again!
And so in the midst of everything I will chose to say “Blessed be the name of the Lord”

I love you Alaina! And I will never forget you nor the influence you were and still are in my life!

8 comments:

Bekah rehm said...

Wow Anna!!! Talk about the power of perspective! All of this is SO.... true, and SO... beautiful when you think of it that way! Though it definately doesn't take the pain away...it puts things in a MUCH better perspective! A heavenly perspective! Thank-you for sharing this! You are so... right, and when I think of it this way it brings such simple gladness to my soul in the midst of sorrow! The peace of knowing Alaina's every dream of heaven is come true! Peace in knowing I can not question God, but I can trust Him! Look what good God is already bringing out of this! Christ has given you a powerful testimony in the midst of great sorrow, and trial. This will reach far past just encouraging those who love our blessed Lord, and Savoir we serve. But to those who can not understand your simple trust in the midst of great pain. You're not denying the pain isn't there, but trusting that it is there for a greater purpose...a higher calling...a truer cause..it will raise questions that can only be answered at the cross! Thank-you Anna you did a beautiful job of honoring the Lord, and Alaina's life in this post! Praise the Lord that we do not grieve without a hope! Amen!

Love Ya Sis!
Bekah

Lesley said...

Amen Anna! Your beautiful post brought tears to my eyes....not only for the pain that you feel, but more for the sweet trust that you have in the Lord and your ability to praise Him...even in the midst of it all. It is in times like these that faith is tested to the very core and what a testimony for you to, even while you hurt, cling to that faith and trust in the precious promises of our Lord! What a witness to those who do not have the same Source of hope! And while Alaina is living her dream of heaven....the impact she made in the lives of so many here will not soon be forgotten. And who knows but that the Lord still has great things to accomplish through her legacy.

Love you Anna! We continue to pray for you all!

Josiah and Abi Wissmann said...

OH, Anna! I don't think I could have said it better myself! Thank you for being honest...because yes...it does still hurt! Yet, thank you for encouraging us to look to the Lord, our source of comfort.

We do not understand HIS ways, but you're so right--HE calls us to trust HIM!

Continuing to hold you before our Savior's throne! HUGS!!!

Laura said...

What a wonderful, honoring, encouraging post, Anna! Thank you so much. We are praying for all of you...

felmleyfam said...

anna
what a relief to read your post. we have been praying for you and your family and josh and his family. we know that it is only the Lord that can draw hearts of strangers to eachother...because we are one body. thank you for looking to JESUS. your perspective of truth made me cry in relief that you are making it through. Glory to the Lord for your post. we will continue to pray for you and have a sweet pic of josh and alaina up on our board to remind us of such tragedy and yet rejoicing. thinking of you, karen felmleyfam@mac.com

Anonymous said...
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Mikala H. said...

Anna,
Your post was SO moving!! I am so glad that the Lord is bringing so much comfort to you. I continue to pray for Josh, you all and the Moore's.
Love your sister in Christ,
Mikala H.

Anonymous said...

What a glory you bring to God by continuing to praise Him in the midst of your family's sorrow. I don't know your family, but found your blog through someone else's. I cannot imagine the pain you are going through, but please know that many who don't even know you, continue to lift Alaina's families and especially Josh up before God asking for grace, mercy and His peace to surround you in the coming days, weeks, and months. Many times I want to question why God allows certain circumstances to happen in our lives, but I can always rest knowing that He has a perfect plan. What a testimony Alaina's life was to the world. Just remember that we serve a Great God, and He will provide all our needs. We will be praying.